Postpartum Depression

2009-05-11T09:24:00.000-07:00

Postpartum depression is a very serious illness. Although I have never had ppd, I have known women who have. There are many different degrees to this illness.

I myself have gone through the "baby blues." Which lasts a few days or weeks after the baby is born. The baby blues are not as severe as the other types of depression after having a baby. Some of the side effects are crying and sometimes for no reason, appetite and sleep patterns are not the same as usual and also feeling sad and overwhelmed.
I have also known a few friends with Postpartum depression. One friend told me that she had never admitted this to anyone before, but that is she saw a pair of scissors or a knife she could actually see herself harming the baby. After she had told me this, I asked her is it was something that she wanted to do or if it was completely involuntary. She told me that it was a thought that she couldn't control and that she was sure she wouldn't have done it because the thoughts scared her so bad. She also had thoughts of hurting herself and she didn't want to be around the baby at all.
Another more severe part of postpartum depression is called Postpartum Psychosis, which is more rare. These women may actually try hurting themselves or the baby. Their mood swings are a lot more rapid and they may see things that are not there.
If you suspect that you or someone else may have this, talking with your doctor is the best thing for you and your entire family. My friend admitted to me her feelings years later and we are very lucky nothing came of it. She was already on antidepressants for long term depression and that probably saved their lives.
People do want to help. Don't be afraid to ask someone, they will be happy that you did. Feeling ashamed and talking about your depression is a lot better then the feelings you would have if you hadn't and something terrible were to happen.

2009-05-10T18:18:00.000-07:00

I have had many experiences while I was pregnant with my two children. My first pregnancy went pretty well other then having morning sickness morning, noon and night and every time in between. Even though I couldn't keep anything down, Aedan came out to be almost 8 pounds. Which is a big baby for my 5 foot frame. The reason I say that my pregnancy with my first son went so well was because I was on bed rest the whole time with my second son. Being pregnant is one thing, but labor is a whole new experience all together. I know labor pretty well since my first time lasted 34 hours of hard labor and had to push for 5 of it, by that time they had to use forceps to pull him out. Like I said before, he was a big baby for my body. I had remember everyone telling me that labor was a terrible pain and after the baby is out all the pain goes away and I wouldn't even remember it. After he was born I could still feel the pain, but since my labor was so long I thought that maybe it would be different for me. My mom and Chad were in the room with me, but my entire family cousins and all were waiting outside the room. I was surprised since it was 5:00 in the morning. One of my cousins came over to me and I told her that I still hurt really bad and that is when she told me that I had a forth degree tear which is the most severe. A few minutes later my doctor came over to me after looking at the baby. I remember hearing my mom telling my aunt that she and my aunt would go to Sioux Falls with the baby and Chad would stay here with me. I remember thinking take Chad with you he needs his dad with him. I had lost so much blood that they were taking me in for emergency surgery. I also remember thinking as I looked at my baby "at least I got to see him before I died." They went back and forth deciding if I had enough time to get to Sioux Falls for surgery or if my doctor would have to do it after everything he had already been through. It was also his birthday the day before and instead of spending it with his family he stayed with me the entire time. I do believe that my doctor saved my life and my sons life. Aedan turned out not to be as serious as they thought and he got to stay in the hospital. It took me 3 years to be able to see the bruises from the forceps on his face.
My second pregnancy was terrible from the beginning. Braxton was born with O+ blood and I am O- so the entire pregnancy my body was trying to fight him off. My morning sickness was a lot worse with him. I couldn't keep anything down at all. I went over 2 weeks without holding anything down. The doctors kept putting me in the hospital because I was dehydrated. They also thought that I had gestational diabetes which I didn't. My heart beat kept getting over 140 beats per minutes which is very bad especially since my normal heart beat was around 65. I was so run down. I had a 4 year old and a 2 year old at home that I had to take care of while I was on bed rest. I was a high risk pregnancy also. In the middle of my pregnancy my mom found out that my dad had been having an affair for the past 3 years. She was afraid to say anything to me because she didn't want me to lose this baby. My children were her whole life. For some reason my mom telling me that didn't do anything to me. I was hurt by what he had done mostly for my mom who had given up a career to take care of her 3 kids. I knew in my heart why I wasn't allowing myself to feel the pain of that. God was protecting me and my baby. Braxton was a pretty small baby, he was born by c-section. After I got home with him I thought something was wrong with me. I was depressed all the time so I thought that I has postpartum depression(PPD). I never had any negative feelings towards my kids, but I did about myself. He was born in January so I couldn't get outside to walk or anything to lose the baby weight. My best friends were getting married 5 weeks after my son was born and I was in the wedding. I started to starve myself which is the wrong thing to do. I talked to my doctor and he gave me some antidepressants which helped me so much. I know now that it wasn't PPD, that it was everything that happened during the pregnancy hitting me all at once. Postpartum depression is a real disease and if you think that you or someone else might have it talk to your doctor. It is not something that you can control and it wont get better with out help. Don't be afraid to ask for help.

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